Why Do We Moderate Comments?

Written by Darrell Vesterfelt Editorial, Featured Content 25 Comments

This has been the hardest week for me since I have started engaging social media about eight years ago. I guess it comes with territory of writing online, and I have to understand that people will not always agree with me. To be honest, I am okay with that, because I really enjoy the conversation.

One of the things I did this week that spurred some really hateful comments toward me was moderating comments on this site. I can understand the confusion that some people might have, and even the frustration of having a thoughtful response deleted.

So I wanted to take time today to share why Prodigal Magazine moderates the comments, how it is done, and how we will commit to honoring everyone involved in the future.

Why Prodigal Magazine Moderates Comments:

I know it is not a very popular thing to moderate comments on a blog/online magazine. We understand that, but we want to be apart of making a safe community. Prodigal, from its beginning has been about the importance of people sharing their story. In waving the banner of storytelling, we invite our writers to be very vulnerable with their experiences.

Our writers have written about their experiences with abuse, past homosexual lifestyles and abusive or controlling relationships with the church. These experiences are still very sensitive, especially in some current Christian circles. All of the Prodigal writers are wounded and vulnerable people (but aren’t we all) and I’ve committed to them to create a safe place to share their story.

The articles that we write are not our opinions but our lives borne in front of you.

As the leader of this site and the community that is gathering around it, I feel charged to protect the vulnerability that is held with high value not only on this site, but in the Gospel.

Prodigal is not, and will not ever be about gathering the biggest number of page views or subscribers. We are about something greater than that.

Community.

When you “click into” this community you have a responsibility, one to listen to the diverse chorus of stories before you choose to disagree. We will die on the hill of, “seek to understand before you seek to be understood.”

If you choose to speak and engage in the conversations here in a way that belittles or dismisses the stories being told, you are choosing to revoke your privilege to this community. I think that we often forget that we are not entitled to everything we see on the internet. It is easy to forget, since we can so easily click on any site with immediate access. Participating in conversations online beg mature and responsible engagement to the people behind the usernames and avatars.

Bullies are not welcome here.

Prodigal holds a high value to truth, which I believe is shared by the many who have responded with great passion to articles we’ve featured. We hold to the belief that truth is best discovered in the midst of community.

I think it is easy for us to feel threatened by those who believe something different, especially if we have invested any bit of time or energy discovering and developing those beliefs, or if we’ve been hurt by people who believe differently than us. I am one of those people. It is easier for me to immediately discredit a person who believes something different from me, than it is to elevate others’ values to a place where I can dignify them and honor them.

After all we are all servants of the same master (Romans 14), and how silly it sounds for one servant to elevate himself to bring judgement on a fellow servant?

Lets all submit that in our humanity we all have a broken understanding of God, and we can best honor God and his children by choosing to recognize our brokenness and at the same time elevate the values that others hold.

We do not all have to agree this side of heaven. And we can take the pressure off ourselves to try to control others into believing the way that we believe. Lets honor those who see God from a different vantage point, rather than, with our anger, try to move them to see what we see.

How Prodigal Comment Moderating is done.

I was accused this week of only deleting the comments of those who hold traditional, conservative Christian beliefs.

This could not be further from the truth.

We moderate comments from both sides of the conversation. Like I said before, no bullies allowed. And according to what I see there are bullies in all camps. There are bullies in the reformed movement, and the feminist movement. There are conservative and liberal bullies. You get my point.

Here are a short, but not exhaustive list of reason we will moderate comments, so you can better understand:

We will moderate comments if there is ever any name calling.
We will moderate comments that show an argumentative nature.
We will moderate comments and commenters who have displayed a disregard for the “seek to understand, before you seek to be understood” principle.
We will moderate comments that leave Bible verses, without choosing to engage in a constructive conversation

Prodigal Will Commit to Honor Everyone

In the future we will do our best to e-mail you with an explanation if your comment is moderated, because we value the perspective everyone has and hope that we can hear all perspectives in an honoring way. We will however reserve the right to not e-mail if we receive a high number of comments that require our attention.

We will also commit to honor those who share stories here, and will block users from the website in the future if abusive commenters continue to step outside of the boundaries we have set in place.

I would like to sincerely apologize to anyone who was hurt by the moderating of comments without a more clear, and written explanation on our website. I take full responsibility for that. We will work to clarify better our stance through this post and a more clear comment policy in the coming weeks.

Thanks again for all your support, and for your voice. We love your story.

[Photo: Canned Muffins, Creative Commons]

About The Author

Darrell Vesterfelt

Darrell is a the founder of Prodigal Press, a storytelling firm based in Minneapolis, and senior editor of Prodigal Magazine. His life’s passion is to help people tell their story so they can see and understand the truth of God at work in their lives. You can follow him on twitter at @dvest.

http://christymcferren.com/ Christy McFerren

This:

“Prodigal is not, and will not ever be about gathering the biggest number
of page views or subscribers. We are about something greater than that…… If you choose to speak and engage in the conversations here in a way
that belittles or dismisses the stories being told, you are choosing to
revoke your privilege to this community. I think that we often forget
that we are not entitled to everything we see on the internet. It is
easy to forget, since we can so easily click on any site with immediate
access. Participating in conversations online beg mature and responsible
engagement to the people behind the usernames and avatars.”

Thank you, Darrell, for protecting the nature of this community. Thank you for choosing to do a difficult thing for the sake of safety, not just for the writers, but even more so for those readers who identify with our stories and would be afraid to walk in similar courage without the creation of a safe community. This is priceless and I really appreciate the stand you’re taking.

Well said.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  Thanks Christy. I hope that we can be at the forefront of this conversation online.
http://twitter.com/mattschaar m@

Darrell, I made a comment in the thread responding to Sammy’s article this week, and I stand by it: you and the team have created a safe place to discuss some really vulnerable topics with a perspective that empathizes with the rough-and-tumble journey that faith cultivates. I don’t think any of us understand the challenge therein, and I applaud you for approaching this community with humility and respect.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  Thanks. I appreciate it.
haguejason

Awesome. Thanks for this, Darrell.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  Glad it resonated with you.
http://twitter.com/Smay15 Stephanie May

Darrell,
As a writer, I feel so protected and cared for because of this article. Thank you for creating a space where stories are celebrated and where it’s ok to be a mess and to be in process. Thank you for protecting our stories and the stories of people reading them from the hurtful things we can sometimes say when we ourselves feel hurt or threatened. Thank you for providing us a place to be heard and accepted, inviting others into that same freedom. I applaud what you’re doing here and I’m deeply grateful for the protection and care.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  Stephanie!
  
  So glad to have you on the team. I think the protection you feel is so important to the ultimate success of this place. Without the safety, our vulnerability is threatened.
Lisa Keck

I rarely see the comments because I read the text in my e-mail. I like what you’re doing though to protect your writers and readers. As a reader I don’t mind a healthy debate but it seems society has forgotten how to disagree without being disagreeable. Have I disagreed with or questioned a statement within a post? Sometimes. But at the same time I admire your writers for sharing their struggle. The overall emotion I see is a feeling of being alone and I would never throw eggs at the soloist on stage.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  I don’t think you will ever find a community where there are no disagreements. I think it is part of the beauty of community. Learning to honor each other in the midst of the conversation is something that is very important!
http://jacquelinegardner.wordpress.com/ Jacqueline Gardner

Every human being who uses the internet needs to read this. Grace-full and truth-full and just everything. Thank you (and all associated w/ Prodigal) for calling us to a higher standard of engagement & discussion, reminding us that the privilege of voicing our opinion comes with the responsibility of respecting another’s, and most of all, for vigilantly protecting the hearts behind the stories. This place is a glimpse into a world restored.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  Wow. Thanks Jacqueline. That was really encouraging, and thanks for being apart of this space with us.
http://twitter.com/KellyW2010 KellyW2010

This page has become a must-read for me – partly because it challenges MY status quo at times. Well done group! This safe place often resounds with truth and grace – which will ALWAYS be challenged by someone. I suspect that the trouble with comments has something to do with the importance of the messages (in part). We love that this is a safe place.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  I think you are right about the importance of messages, I hope we can all learn to communicate important messages with grace instead of force.
  
  Cheers.
http://twitter.com/LivingOneHanded Ryan Haack

Please don’t delete this.

You’re doing a good thing, friend. Haters gonna hate. Hang in there.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  Thanks Ryan.
http://twitter.com/wanderinglizzie Elizabeth Hudson

Bravo! Your stance is risky, but it’s necessary. And it’s also exactly what we’re called to do – to take care of each other and watch each other’s backs. As someone who finds vulnerability difficult even around the closest friends, this means so much.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  The risk is worth it in my mind. I am glad you are around here Elizabeth.
http://twitter.com/jtcormier77 Jason Cormier

Very well written and thought out post and explanation of your sites thought process. As one who has had to deal with online bullies, I find your efforts admirable.
- http://darrellvesterfelt.com/ Darrell Vesterfelt
  
  Thanks Jason. No one likes bullies.
http://www.beckycastlemiller.com/ Becky Castle Miller

This is really powerful, beyond just a comment policy: “And we can take the pressure off ourselves to try to control others into believing the way that we believe.”

That actually makes me breathe easier. It’s not my responsibility to change anyone’s mind.

I think a safe space is more important than a free-for-all.
Emily Wierenga

Thank you for sticking up for us, Darrell. For being an amazing moderator and friend. For being Jesus in flesh. Blessings.
http://www.facebook.com/melindatoad Melinda Todd

Good for you! I moderate the comments on my site because of the vulnerable nature of what I share and what others share. It protects my innocent readers from creepy weirdos, and trust me, I attract some of the best! Because there are sickos that think it’s funny to post horrible things to those who have been sexually abused. They can get away with it elsewhere, but I’m not going to be part of it. Keep up the good work. Not everything we think, should be put out there to others.
http://www.facebook.com/janel.andrews2 Janel Andrews

Thank you Darrell for this explanation. I did not know that this was going on, but I can imagine that it has been incredibly difficult for you. Thank you for speaking with grace and clarity. The reminder that “I think that we often forget that we are not entitled to everything we see on the internet. It is easy to forget, since we can so easily click on any site with immediate access. Participating in conversations online beg mature and responsible engagement to the people behind the usernames and avatars.” SUCH a timely reminder.
http://lightovercomesdarkness.com/ Rev Wendy Wolf

I discovered this website less than a week ago, synchronistically.

I have read about a dozen stories, and enjoyed the storytelling and appreciated the wisdom of almost every one of them.
I enjoy the variety of perspectives of the authors and the feedback folks.

2 things I am particularly enjoying:

1)
I feel comfortable in this forum, in a way that is unusual in most ‘Christian settings’.

Clearly there is a commitment to community, to author interaction with readers, to safety, to authenticity, to sharing and being-with real life in the context of our faith.

I am encouraged in my own walk, and I am encouraged for the Body of Christ, to find this place which can feel like ‘home’ for so many – in the ways that edify and support.

2)
I have been moved, changed by this style of writing: life-based not ideal-based, reality-based not rational-theoretical.

The political, the theological and philosophical, the humanly useful
truly is personal, particular, contextual.

This website has changed how I see the world and how I desire to communicate in the world, in a very short time.

Darrell + Allison – Thank you all for providing this forum, what an incredible labor of love and wisdom it must be. Seems like you had a challenging week with finding appropriate boundaries and setting limits. Appreciate your work.

writers and all – thanks you for Being this community. Appreciate your vulnerability, You are a Light in the world.

I look forward to playing here, going forward.
in life, wendy

Prodigal Magazine is an online publication that is passionate about helping people live and tell good stories. We believe that every person is equipped to live a good story, and that your story can begin here. God designed you with interests, talents and passions as signposts to point you in the right direction. Living a good story meanings paying attention to these signposts, engaging life without fear of failure, and taking risks to create beauty. Sharing your stories with those around you teaches you about yourself, about the world you are apart of, and about how to continue, as a part of a community, living a story worth telling. When we bring stories together, on one collective venue, they scream the truth of the Gospel. Our stories, whether we know it or not, have the fingerprints of God all over them.

Stories are like mirrors. You can hold them up to see your reflection, make realizations about yourself, and then invite others to do the same. We urge you to join us, to join the conversation, to join the community.